The ABCD Syndrome

I guess ABCD syndrome strikes everyone. On a second thought maybe it should be abroad instead of America to generalise the scenario. And, it is definitely not limited to the NRIs. I should add by the look of it that it is the desi born people who are more prone to it. Wonder how and why? Well I’m not too sure about both of them right now, it being just my first trip abroad.

I spent my complete week trying to adjust to the cultural shock I received. The irony of it, it is because of my fellow country men rather than foreigners. There was I, luckily with no symptoms of jet lag, raring to go, eager to drink in the beauty of fall, marvelling the colours of nature, the chillness of the wind, the friendly nature of the people, and then I receive my first shock. While I am still recovering from the blow I receive my second. And by the time I could face the third, I am seriously contemplating going back home.

I am in no hurry to reveal my cultural shocks. They are at the same time serious and funny. It is indeed highly amusing to see people grapple with identity crisis…no offence meant.

I know that to be in Rome, we have to be Roman. But does that mean that we change to such an extent that we are losing our identity? Just imagine being stuck forever at the crossroads… the phoney accents, the false pretences of superiority, the foolish belittling of your origins….the list is endless…One would wonder at the extent people go to disown their true identity.

Ever tried eating pakoda with a fork and knife???....lemme tell you, it is comical. I never realised it till I saw someone try it. That person had a helluva job trying to eat it unconventionally. No wonder he must be cursing that it is always easier to eat steak with a fork and knife. I guess by now, you would get that this so called genius is an abcd. This was just the starters. During my four and half months stay abroad I encountered many such things. It still amazes me, how people try to ape someone to gain acceptance. I did meet another classical ABCD for whom anything from his country was considered cheap. He would strut around with an air of such conceited arrogance that it took a toll on my patience limits. You see, I had this urge to punch his daylights out whenever he belittled my motherland, which by chance happens to be his too.

If these people were a class in themselves, no offence meant, then there were these new groupies who had come down abroad for the first time like me. To them everything about the west was picture perfect. These were the ones who bragged about the host nations till their voices were hoarse. I think they suffered from short term memory loss. Scathing as I may sound, it was indeed bad to see these people behave like long lost puppies waiting eagerly for scarps. It miraculously seemed to escape them that they were at the end of the day Indians. It did remind me of the tale of the blue jackal which I remember reading long long ago. At times it was down right funny and at times gut wrenching to see them make a fool of themselves.

All that I saw and experienced abroad, made me do some serious contemplation. What is so bad about being Indian that they are quite a many of them who would gladly disown their identity? Is being a citizen of the largest democracy in the world such a bad sin? Does it count to nothing that there are fields where we are the front runners and trail blazers? How is it that a civilization which withstood thousands of invasions plundering it for wealth and prosperity suddenly loose its sheen?

When at one point where I was overwhelmed by the emotion it invoked, I came to realise that come what may, for every one hundred who choose to alienate themselves from their identity, there are ten thousand others who gladly wear it on their sleeves and will not flinch in saying that they are Indians. For those few pathetic souls who do not realise what they lost, there are many more enlightened ones who revel in their identity and making waves where ever they go. Being there, and seeing my country for the first time in a completely different light made me realise, how blessed I was to be part of this great land. The variety it offers, the diverse cultures, the splendid heritage, nothing can beat my India. What if a few ABCDs fail to realise the splendour of being distinctly Indian? It is their misfortune and not mine. Come heaven or hell there will never be another India for me, nor another identity, coz for me “ East or West, India is the BEST “

Lament of a secondary citizen

Not long ago, I believed that I would dictate the terms, that I would decide what is it that I want in life and that I will charter the course of my life my way. There was no second guessing here. All I ever wanted to do was to hold life by neck and steer my path to blazing glory. Maybe I am being a triffle too over the top. But then that is what I honestly believed, till reality choose to crash itself and give a rather rude awakening.

Centuries have passed by, every once in a while some one would exhault the divine feminine, that it was the female of the species which was stronger, and that the so called perfect balance in life can be found only when both the male and female exist in perfect harmony as equals. Oh! How I would marvel at the thought. Being a female I know for sure that I am more than capable of holding my own in any given field I choose. I know for sure that I am second to none. But then it depresses me that in this present day world where we are progressing at mind boggling rates, where change seems to be the way of life, I still am considered a secondary citizen.

It hurts to know that all that I struggled for with such passion and zeal can be so trivial to many. It is not out of ordinary, someone had the nerve to say. It would never matter that I share the same qualification as many of those so called superior species, that I work in an reputed organisation and have a career to boast about. It wont change the fact I am quite good at what I do and that I dream of conquering loftier peaks in the near future and take my best shot at changing what I feel needs to change. It is sickening to know that no matter how superior you are intellectually, you are judged by your looks alone.

I may have the brains of Einstein, but if don’t have the sultry looks of some darn seductress, I am considered nothing. I was appalled by the irony of it. I am supposed to be picture perfect with brains to boot, to match up to some pathetic creature, mind you with almost the same qualification as me and earning on par with me. I feel sorry for those stuck in this quagmire. And I am definitely ANGRY for being subjected to this humiliation. Which sane person would accept it?? All my knowledge and self worth would be mockery, if I willingly subjected myself to this indignity without even putting up a fight.

And the irony of it, I never once regretted the fact that I was a female. I was never given a chance to nurse such regret. When faced with any such indignity, I made sure to trample that person underfoot for ever doubting my ability. But now I regret being born a female. I regret being in the place where no matter how progressive the society claims itself to be, no matter how broad minded But now I regret being born a female. I regret being in the place where no matter how progressive the society claims itself to be, no matter how broad minded certain intellectuals are, you are still denied certain basic rights. You are still trampled upon and expected to surrender meekly without a fight. You are still expected to be one to compromise on things, and to be the one to surrender.

I may sound like a FCS, but then I care two hoots about people think when it comes to my individuality. An individual I am, an independent one at that and I know for sure that I will fight tooth and nail if I am ever to be subjected to such indignities. All said and done, I wait in bated in breath for that real change to happen where I am not a secondary citizen anymore, where all’s well in God’s world with real harmony amongst people.